The second worst call of my life came on September 11, 2019.
The worst call came on May 19, 2021.
The second worst call? They suspected my mom had pancreatic cancer, we just weren’t sure how bad, yet.
The worst call? My dad saying three words that shattered me. “She died, Ivy.”
All of the healing I had done previously after struggling in silence, unraveled when my mom got sick.
I lost myself in ways I am still trying to build back.
But what I had to re-learn from losing my best friend, is that being strong doesn’t mean just “pushing through.”
And being strong definitely didn’t mean putting on a happy face so she couldn’t feel my fear, like others told me to do.
What being strong really means?
💛Screaming in your car, letting it all out.
💛Crying and feeling all of the feelings that come up.
💛Talking to friends, to a therapist, to loved ones.
Being strong means that you allow yourself to feel the pain,
But that you also remind yourself that you are worthy of moving forward.
So you do.
You don’t push your feelings off.
Instead, you feel them and face them head on and give yourself permission to heal.
Your steps may feel more difficult moving forward, but you continue to take them.
And that’s what strength looks like.
That’s the kind of strength my mom left me with.
💛 To anyone carrying a heavy heart while still moving forward—I see you.
Grief changes us, but it doesn’t take away our ability to heal.
What has strength looked like for you in your journey?
-Ivy Watts, MPH, Mental Health Empowerment Speaker