There’s been a lot going on in my family. Unfortunately, my father-in-law passed away two weeks ago and that’s been shocking and challenging for us all. It’s felt so unfair that we have lost yet another parent in such a short amount of time. Through all of this, I’ve had to find ways to support my husband, deal with the trauma that my father-in-law’s passing has brought up for me with my mom, and still be a full time mom. It’s become at times lonely and isolating. A good friend reminded me that I was whole before I was a mom and I was whole before I was a wife. Both my husband and my daughter only add to my life, but I have never depended on either for my happiness.
My therapist reminded me that this time is just going to be really tough. But it’s about finding those pockets of moments of joy or peace or calm, to keep us moving forward. When my friend kindly reminded me of how whole I am already without anyone else, I started to remind myself of the things that make me feel like me. I’ve challenged myself to get back into running, something that makes me feel like myself and makes me feel whole and gives me peace. And by making this choice to do something that reminds me of my wholeness, it will allow me to be the best wife and mom to those I love the most. Having something to look forward to reminds me that this is a really, really hard time, but it won’t be like this forever. I am intentionally choosing to invest in me. Just because there is a lot going on right now and I have a lot on my plate, does not mean that I’m not worthy of taking care of myself, in fact, it means I am even more worthy of showing up for myself.
We can spend a lot of time seeking out people or material things to try and add value to our lives and to try and use these people or things to seek wholeness. When we do that, if we lose that person or thing, we can feel incomplete, lost and without direction. This is your reminder that you are whole as you are right now. You were whole before and you are whole now. Even if you feel that you have depended on something or someone for your happiness, you can start today to invest in yourself and fuel your own happiness. You are worthy of that.
I’m reminding myself today that I am whole as I am, and even though this summer has been full of hardships, loneliness and disappointments, it doesn’t have to end this way. I challenge you, just like I am challenging myself to find those pockets of joy and hope in your day or in your week. I challenge you to find something that brings you joy and that you can do for you to remind yourself that you are whole and worthy as you are in this moment. I hope you get to a point in your life that no matter what setbacks you experience, you can always remind yourself that you don’t have to depend on someone for your happiness, that you have the keys to creating your happiness and that others around you only add to your happiness. I hope you find something in your life that reminds you that you are whole as you are. I am on this journey with you.
Be Beautifully Simply You Yo