This past weekend, I was at a pretty big conference and this conference really helped me to see just how far I’ve come in my most recent self-love journey. I was on a panel and while my fellow panelist was responding to a question, I realized that I had something I wanted to say to piggyback off of his comment. The second I started talking, I completely lost my train of thought and said out loud, “Oh my God, I forget what I was saying”. I tried not to panic, I pivoted and asked him to repeat the point he just made, and then thankfully, I remembered what I wanted to say. In years past, and in these past few months, I probably would have beat myself up about that mistake during such a huge opportunity. But instead, I laughed about my mistake, blamed it on mom brain, and just allowed myself to continue to be who I am. In that moment, I did two things. One, I gave myself compassion which allowed me to continue on the rest of the panel effectively, and two, I showed people that I am practicing what I preach and that we are only human, we will make mistakes, but it’s about giving ourselves love and grace to keep moving forward.
Imagine I instead was negative and hateful towards myself during the rest of the panel? I probably would have continued to mess up and not do as well as I could have because the negative mindset of “Oh my God Ivy what’s wrong with you. You don’t deserve to be here” etc., would have just told my brain to shut down and keep me from responding in the best way I could. Imagine if I was negative the whole rest of the day, I probably would have had a lot of doubts and fears for my presentation the next morning. And I can imagine this life because I’ve lived it throughout my entire collegiate career. And as I’ve mentioned in past blog posts, I am in a stage of rebuilding my self worth.
It’s truly remarkable to see that the work you are doing practicing self-care and self-love in the quiet moments of your life, is paying off when you are in high pressure, anxiety provoking moments. It might not feel like the daily journaling, affirmations, meditations, exercise, or whatever tool you’re doing, is paying off, but it is. Those few moments of self-care every day are laying the foundation so when tough moments arise and your brain automatically wants to criticize you, you can come back to the tools you’re building every single day.
Taking care of yourself and your mental health is such a beautiful thing. I’m seeing the impact yet again on this journey of putting myself first, giving myself love and grace and taking in the moments where I make mistakes with forgiveness and not criticism. I still have a long way to go but I’m so proud of myself thus far.
And I hope you’re proud of you too. Because every day you show up, every day you decide to take care of yourself, you’re closer and closer to setting yourself up to experience a life full of love, self-validation, forgiveness and joy. You are doing the hard work now that will pay off later.
Keep going. I’m right there with you. We can do this.
Be Beautifully Simply You